Sorry for asking this again....

[EliB]

Hi all,
Some of you may remember (from the previous FS site) that I'd had problems with my Minister regarding highly offensive comments he'd made to me and his subsequent denial and aggression when I tried to discuss these comments with him.

Within the great support I received on FS at that time, there was reference to a Biblical verse which stated how it was the right thing to have a 3rd person present when speaking to a preacher (or words to that effect) which my own Minister denied me. I was just wondering if anyone could tell me again what that Biblical verse was?

Sorry to be asking this again, but I'm still trying to resolve this issue and would appreciate any assistance!!

Thanks a lot!!

[AndyHB]

[JJ]

[EliB]

Andy and JJ, thanks a lot for that!! Much appreciated!

[AndrewF]

I do pray that you manage to sort this out with him Eli as it is clearly quite a problem coming between you and church... (deliberate small 'c')

[EliB]

Thanks Andrew.....I've now got some assistance, prompted by my sister talking to her Minister (CofS in Aldershot!) for some guidance about the situation (she said she was angry that her Church is everything that she sees that a church SHOULD be and that I can't go to mine because of my Minister's offensive behaviour!)...he has suggested a few options, one of which being that he has said HE would be willing to contact my Minister....considering that but not sure if it would inflame the situation further (although right now I don't have THAT much to lose!)

Yet again on here, the support/assistance is amazing! Proving that a "community" doesn't need to be immediate in vicinity!
Thanks all!!!!

[AndyHB]

... one of which being that he has said HE would be willing to contact my Minister....considering that but not sure if it would inflame the situation further (although right now I don't have THAT much to lose!)

Think I'd reserve this for a last resort.  Wonder whether you could get a couple of local others who would support you.

[EliB]

... one of which being that he has said HE would be willing to contact my Minister....considering that but not sure if it would inflame the situation further (although right now I don't have THAT much to lose!)

Think I'd reserve this for a last resort.  Wonder whether you could get a couple of local others who would support you.

Hi Andy
Spoke at length on the phone to this other Minister this evening and amongst other options discussed, have kind of decided to try writing a letter to my Minister....not as a further accusation, but as a way of trying to pave the way to a possible resolution! He did 'warn' or advice me not to be too specific in the letter as I don't know who else might see it - to be vague enough for other eyes, but cryptic enough that HE will understand what I'm referring to and what I'm looking to resolve! He said if there was either a negative response or no response, then we'd rethink (like you say, him speaking to my Minister as an option much further down the list!)  but to try that first - he also suggested getting a trusted friend in the church to read it over first....just more for my own protection.
It really felt helpful to be able to discuss it (verbally, I mean as opposed to on here!!) openly with someone who was being supportive and encouraging with suggestions....I just wish our Minister was like this guy!!!

Thanks, yet again, for the support on here!!

[ecuworrier]

Thanks Andrew.....I've now got some assistance, prompted by my sister talking to her Minister (CofS in Aldershot!) for some guidance about the situation (she said she was angry that her Church is everything that she sees that a church SHOULD be and that I can't go to mine because of my Minister's offensive behaviour!)...he has suggested a few options, one of which being that he has said HE would be willing to contact my Minister....considering that but not sure if it would inflame the situation further (although right now I don't have THAT much to lose!)

Yet again on here, the support/assistance is amazing! Proving that a "community" doesn't need to be immediate in vicinity!
Thanks all!!!!

Bless you EliB...

i am not sure what you want to achieve here....  please don't think i am looking at this in any other way but perspective.....

let me start with ... i personally have no objection to your sister's minister putting theri ore in ... i think the situation is a bit of a mess...

i think i see the current situation in two or three ways or even more ways....   1) is your needs as a human and in that i DO include your Spirituality

2) the views / response of your immediate pastor

3) the relationship of you and your church community

4) the wider political aspects of how someone in your (and many other situations) should be treated by 'the organisation'

in the first instance

i can see that it might be seen as a bit of a crusade... where actually you are seeking and needing support.... Grace, respect, love, healing, and for that to be taken seriously.... all of that i'm with you on.....  sometimes we just have to accept that the place we expect to find it in the first place just well has a door that says 'preoccupied' .... whereas Jesus' door  doesn't it's open and the places it leads us towards is all of what you need ....  what happens next is well....  what happens next...

GOD BLESS!

Peace and Love,

[EliB]

Thanks Andrew.....I've now got some assistance, prompted by my sister talking to her Minister (CofS in Aldershot!) for some guidance about the situation (she said she was angry that her Church is everything that she sees that a church SHOULD be and that I can't go to mine because of my Minister's offensive behaviour!)...he has suggested a few options, one of which being that he has said HE would be willing to contact my Minister....considering that but not sure if it would inflame the situation further (although right now I don't have THAT much to lose!)

Yet again on here, the support/assistance is amazing! Proving that a "community" doesn't need to be immediate in vicinity!
Thanks all!!!!

Bless you EliB...

i am not sure what you want to achieve here....  please don't think i am looking at this in any other way but perspective.....

let me start with ... i personally have no objection to your sister's minister putting theri ore in ... i think the situation is a bit of a mess...

i think i see the current situation in two or three ways or even more ways....   1) is your needs as a human and in that i DO include your Spirituality

2) the views / response of your immediate pastor

3) the relationship of you and your church community

4) the wider political aspects of how someone in your (and many other situations) should be treated by 'the organisation'

in the first instance

i can see that it might be seen as a bit of a crusade... where actually you are seeking and needing support.... Grace, respect, love, healing, and for that to be taken seriously.... all of that i'm with you on.....  sometimes we just have to accept that the place we expect to find it in the first place just well has a door that says 'preoccupied' .... whereas Jesus' door  doesn't it's open and the places it leads us towards is all of what you need ....  what happens next is well....  what happens next...

GOD BLESS!

Peace and Love,

Hey Ecu,
What I'm trying to achieve here is a resolution to the problem to the extent that I'll feel able to attend church - which at the moment I can't! What I was looking for with my initial enquiry was information, about the CofS's policy of encouraging sex offenders back into workship (info I now have courtesy of my sister's minister!). Yes, it would be nice to think that my church could be a source of support, but it feels like the days where that's exactly how it DID feel, are long gone......right now I'd settle for feeling able to attend! If how I've gone about this (ie looking for information) is seen as a "crusade" by some, then TBH that's their problem (IMO!!). As a church member, I should have the right to ask any question about an aspect of the church which concerns me - and I shouldn't really have to justify my reasons for asking.....never mind be insulted for asking...!
I'm hoping that this can be resolved, even to a degree....I do miss church and (most!!) of the people there!