errmmm ummmphff... few days worth...

ermmmm ummmmphff completely anxious  a mix of total anxiety and talking to GOD and being preoccupied with the complexities of the journey of the week.... and feeling pretty complexed out...

GOD has been busy... and i am in that state of awareness of /// what should i do? ... and what should GOD do actually what can GOD do to make it feel better... i find i have missed 2 sermons on the same subject GOD the parent the good way the bad way... the thing is ... how do we learn to discriminate.. how do we recognise for ourselves ... the sermons are convinced thjat GOD does a whole pile of correcting and it hurts.. and i guess under these models we are left in that place as naughty children of GOD or 'good' children of GOD or someplace in between... broadly speaking it is some place in between... so how does that affect you? or does it? the person who goes out pleasing the good parent the person who is pissed off and misunderstood by the 'bad' or inadequate parent?  it's abit of a nobrainer innit... i mean actually what is a good parent somebody who rears good accountants ..

i get some bum prayers by a good parent of no children somebody who has a job of youff work at their church... i shoudl have stopped them actually... but all i did in the end was call out to GOD open my eyes and look at them!.....  oh brother!  ... all i could see was a weird effect of stuff passing by and you know what i didn't mind it flying by it was all city stuff all modern techonology and electronics an artistic style reminisnent of the blackandwhiteness of the 60's this may seem a contradiction but hey who did youkjnow with a colour tv... programmes were put in b/w perspective... it's also kindof pixilated that flying by..... who has been praying for this guy ? i should of asked really... the thing is they has prayed for me before wonderfully some years ago.... and here we is in the same argument of sorts....   and why actually i ask him to reflect back to me what he thinks i am actually saying ... no wonder we have black and white demonic imaging flying past he has just prayed for me and cannot for the life of me understand the conversation in anything other terms as worldly .... so there is a no brainer... i give a huge sigh put it straight and walk off.... you see what the great and the good are trying to do? protect theri patches they ask the gods of patch protectionism to protect theri patches... and me i gotta go an give GOD the clean up... it sure is a dirty place to be all that electronics and black toner .. i am disappointed most of all cos of there was once a time... and it's a time they has run from ... i cannot believe they would want to forsake of GOD GOD... but for the sake of.... something that is what they are dong... can we trust GOD is it not about can I trust GOD... let me see now... the conversation was on an odd fling.... i broacjhed the subject cos ... well i had wandered into this place just in time for tea and wandered through and found some folks i met before bidding me sit down... i want to show you something first... 1)_there is a guy there who readily shakes hands with me stands up to do so... i sit remembering the tone of his conversation thoroughly unpallatable... his battles and i prayed for him last time i was down.... while everyone else was shrieking into oblivion on the mindset thing!.... and here he was transformed!.... hey it's just that GOD is GOD and that's what needs to happen belief is in  danger of being an empty shell without the evidence of GOD's LOVE GOD's EXISTENCE!!!... hey GOD IS GOD!!!!  i was just there on an occasion or two to have this guy on my heart to pray for... so do i feel the efforts of my prayer were answered oh yes!.... that is an encouragement to me what about all the other folks who prayed well hopes they were round and about too encouraged!...  there was someone looking bleak who was engaged in conversation but i did not know... we had a fascinating and moving conversation and though i held back considerably in my comments about me... i found that i actually was the exact right person for someone who was anxious about the circumstances and social group they found themselves placed in... hugs all round! amazing
!... what about the gays in this church ? well youknow what i got one picture from this person... and so i huyng about to wait for the other person...  and that's when oh LORD what is going on?  let me not be overly prescriptive actually...
bebacksoon

GOD BLESS!

Peace and Love,