Message #1746

[ecuworrier]

the ad 'Reihnhardt Bonnke's miracle prayer... makes me wonder slightly if i am seeing things i mean who pays for ads like that? and well sadly i don't get it... then i look back anddd ... it's gone....  there's no-one to say to excuse me can you just have a look what does that say?

ah yes there were a coupla things from yesterday still....

one was...  what!!!?????? there it is ! i have in deed been searching high and low and even asked if anyone had emptied the shared hoover... well they had but the last time i saw it had been well the day approx last time i had hoovered which was.... well before the last emptying of the hoover....  look anyway... i don't bother those dates don't match and ..... this was weeks ago.....  well me i had a good old hoover yesterday with the same machine as i had used that day when i had finished i was retiduying some stuff and there it was!....

i was given a book voucher some time ago and the nice thing about book vouchers is you get to choose your own present but me maybe the whole voucher culture thing never came my way when it would have been very useful to have that inside knowledge! about how is the best way to choose a present!... i have to admit i am crap consequently i have had this highly treasured bookvoucher for some time ... what me? buy books ? it's the thought that counts! now that sort of present i can cope with! the giver genuinely wanted to and hey i don't have to deal with whether i like the actuality of the present .....

this bookvoucher has fallen in two parts as i felt it was a pretty special present really and i didn't want it to go to waste with wrong choices and all that! but that said....   the two parts where one should be are it seems quite mobile and it was one of these that went missing... and now was found again!

since it went missing .... i have felt challenged and tested.... you see the person who gave it to me in the first place and i have well not exactly fallen out but there is a monumnetal distance even for me an agressive stance...  i mean you don't do such patriarchal theology at me and get away with that!.... but what above all else has changed has been that they really have changed quite a bit and the full of well the usual imperfection person that person was i warmed to and the new ghost version i really do not.... all i can say is that to me it looks like a whole lot is wrong and me all i is doin is lookin on and sayin that to me it looks like a whole lot is wrong ... and actually them by their choices ? oor is it? well those are the choices that they has made!  see as you can see i am full of sympathy... but really i grieve for the person they were... however the distance is a mutual event i feel and necessity filled with hostility... i mean you cannot have such patriarchal control philosophy and not be be necessarily aggressive and hostile... so me is wary and them well....

so  the loss of the voucher was really testing my sense of justice .....  the gift given but unredeemed.. the important thing to the giver was the gift... what one did with it after that.....  well needless to say thay i still do not know what to do with it now it is found again... but it is hard to honour the giver fully at a time the giver now is a full stranger of the sort that wouldn't give the likes of me a gift .... hey so bge it!

the other bit of yesterday threw me..... there was a time of a short time of prayer there were three of us and we all prayed ..... afterwards......  i was wondering along... you see don know about you but otherpeoples' prayers at times can feel like a bit of a book list... or just a list of something or other!..... and i think we cna get have those moments .....well .... there is also the raising your voice... well that's what you do when you want to be heard isn't it seems logical.... well there is also that raised voice (hey i am including myself in here) that is no-one is listening to me hey i feel isolated and etetc etc..... well the raising of voice in pulblic prayer meetings is pretty interestiung!.... and when i hearsd that sense of raisevoice like no-on e is listening but we wish they would please? help? you are real arent' you ? and i was out walking later on and pondering this raised voice stuff.... and that inglish thing to shout the louder the same things that weren't understood at least not in context earlier..... and i ws sayin in my mind.... wwh if you find you are shouting.... then just take a breath... ii was meaning the central aspect to all this is that communion with the Father and as i said that guess what i was filled with the Holuy spirit i cam over all funny kept walking but came over all funny wow!


GOD BLESS!

Peace and Love,